I still have a lot to learn about working this program! I goofed this morning. I hit the publish button before I was ready. I needed to fix a few things before the post was ready for the world to see. I thought it would resend the email out once I updated my post. I was wrong. In case you were wondering when the post was going to appear, here is the correct link. The Latest “Doings” at the Double Portion Ranch. Thanks for your patience.
Ignore the last post! It is not finished yet. I hit publish instead of preview. The correct version will be published soon.
Thanks for understanding.
I missed my sheep’s birthday by a few days for the blog post. She was born on May 5, 2013. It was a Sunday morning and we were on the way to church. We were scheduled to be greeters that morning. We never made it to church that morning.
We were on the way to the car and noticed a group of sheep behind the house. One of the pregnant ewes was acting strangely. We went to investigate. It was obvious that she was in active labor. We were going to see a lamb being born. We had only lived here for a few months and had not yet seen a birth. We were excited.
This was a first-time mom. She was scared and had no idea what to do. She literally pushed out the lamb onto the ground and ran. She did not want to have anything to do with her baby. We tried to introduce the lamb to her. Sometimes, if you can get the lamb to nurse, mom will accept it. It wasn’t happening. So we became first-time lamb surrogate parents.
We had our first bummer lamb.`That is the correct agricultural term for a lamb that is raised either partially or completely by humans. Since we do not have a barn she was raised in the house in a dog crate. My older daughter and I took turns doing the required around the clock feedings.
The same week, we acquired a 4-month-old Great Pyreness puppy. I didn’t want the dog but we had friends in desperate need. Our friends were in the military. He was within days of putting in his papers for retirement and received orders. They couldn’t take the puppy with them. They were moving from 5 acres to house in a subdivision. We took the dog. His name is Balto. He stole my heart. I can’t imagine life without him. He is important on our ranch.
I would never have made it through the first few months without Rachel’s help. She is an amazing surrogate sheep mom.
The rhyme goes, “Mary had a little lamb.” My little lamb grew up to be a beautiful ewe. Happy 4th birthday Pistol!
For I know the plans I have for you
This morning I was putting some clothes in the dryer. Umm, the setting was wrinkle release. I dried them last night and forgot to take them out of the dryer. Of course, it was the load that had items in it that would wrinkle. I was talking to God while I was working. I asked Him to direct my steps today. I had several things that I wanted/needed to get done today but I wanted to do the things he had planned for me today. I said my prayer and got on with my day and didn’t think anything of it until…
This is the second version of this blog post. The computer froze and I had to restart it. I lost the entire entry. It was almost finished. I guess God had other ideas of what needed to be said. I can believe that or I can get upset about losing my work. I guess I know which is better. But, there is a big part of me that feels like I wasted my time.
I liked the previous blog post. This one is very different than the one I had planned. Maybe those words will be for another day.
Today, he is reminding me of the beginning of Jeremiah 29:11. It says, “For I know the plans I have for you”. He knows the plans! I asked to do what he wanted me to do today. I am a calendar person and I make “to do” lists. But he has a plan. We tend to think of God’s plan for our life. But we forget that he has a daily plan.
It is way too easy for me to plan out my day or my week with the things that need to be done. I am not saying that is a bad thing because we each have responsibilities. I am flustered when things don’t go the way I had planned. I could have been upset when the computer ate my blog post. I would have been if I had not remembered my prayer.
As I look at my emotional reactions the last few days, I know that I have not been content. I have made plans and they have not turned out that way. Dinner was way late last night and that bugged me. I had planned to have dinner ready at a reasonable hour but we didn’t eat until about 7:45. Hubby and I fed the animals. It took longer than it should have. We had to rescue an emu stuck in the garden area. Then we had to rescue a sheep that had his head stuck in the fence. I had planned to grill hamburgers for dinner. I lit the charcoal and went inside to prepare the meat. I went outside to check the coals and the fire had completely gone out. I lost about 30 minutes. Nothing major happened. All the animals were safe and we ate dinner. But things did not happen like I planned. I forgot that the plan is his not mine.
This morning, he reminded me that the plan is his with a frozen computer. What about you? Do you have the similar struggles? Let me know what you think.
Sometimes my days are as packed and out of focus as these ewes waiting to be sheared. Remember the plan is His.
I live in a small, rural community. We have one high school. Many of the students have parents and grandparents that attended that same school. We have only lived here a few years and are slowly building those ties to the community. Two years ago today at 9:41 a.m. tragedy struck that shook the town. One of our teenagers committed suicide at the high school during the school day. Though I did not know them, the family was a part of my church. The family was loved in the community. I would guess 1000 or more showed up for the funeral. Our church building seats 400 at best. There were people packed everywhere. There were even some watching the service on a video screen outside. For me, after the funeral, the family faded back into the background because I didn’t know them.
But, I would see them at church. I would pray for them but didn’t want to intrude on their grief. I didn’t know them. That changed a few months ago. The mom started to go the women’s group that I am a part of. We had a few conversations and I added her as a Facebook friend. I subscribed to her blog. I watched her and her husband at church. They are not the same people I saw two years ago. Grief has changed them as grief always does. But, they have allowed grief to change them for the better. They have run into the arms of their Savior and are receiving his healing touch.
Some, in times of tragedy, run from God. They ran to God. They have been touched by their friends, family and their church. They have not stopped living. Life goes on for the survivors of a suicide. I have listened to Cassie, the mom, at the women’s group. She has shared stories of tears and of joy. She has shared how her family has reached out to help other families that have been affected by teen suicide.
I don’t mean to sound like they don’t struggle, she has shared those stories too. What I see in Cassie’s life is the love of God shining. She has chosen to trust God in one of the most difficult situations a parent can be.
Life goes on and Cassie is not stuck in the past. I have heard her talk of memories of her son but she doesn’t live there. Her husband is a local police officer. He recently tested for promotion. She asked for prayer for his test. She talked about planning a birthday surprise for her youngest son. She found the specific tennis shoes he had asked for. She was excited to be able to give them to him.
I titled this post 731. That is the title of the post on her blog. I don’t think she will mind me using it too. She starts her post by saying that 731 is the number of days that they have survived since the death of their son. She chose to write the blog post on this day to grieve, honor her son and maybe save a life. I would like to stand with her.
Her son, Isaac, had struggled with depression. He was receiving help. But it was too little, too late. My family has a history of mental illness. No one has succeeded with suicide. There are extended family members who have considered it. I also have a dear friend whose husband committed suicide. I have been on the fringes of it.
Our society puts a stigma on mental illness. We in the church are no better. Mental illness can be treated. If you are in a place where you are considering suicide, there is help. The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline is available 24/7 at 1-800-273-8255. You are not alone.
I tell the story as an outsider. If you would like to read more, this is Cassie’s blog post. I write today to honor her family and the memory of her son, Issac. I also write with the hope that another life can be saved. I have scheduled this post to be published at 9:41 a.m. to honor Issac.
What about you?
I know that suicide and mental illness are hard topics to talk about. If you are struggling, there is help. Even if you do not have health insurance, there are places you can receive treatment. Reach out. Yes, it is scary to admit you are struggling. Take a chance and reach out. It may be your own life you are saving. As always, comments are welcome. If you would like to say something to me privately, add that to your comment. Comment do not appear for public viewing until I have seen and approved them.